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As of 2013, half of adults ages 50-64 had a social media profile (Vandeweerd, Myers, Coulter, Yalcin, & Corvin, 2016) and today, a growing number of
Pros and Cons of Online Dating in Later Life. As of 2013, half of adults ages 50-64 had a social media profile (Vandeweerd, Myers, Coulter, Yalcin, & Corvin, 2016) and today, a growing number of older adults are using online dating sites and apps to meet new people (Wada, Clarke, & Rozanova, 2015). Older adults who are divorced are significantly more likely to use these online dating sites than those who are widowed or have never married (AARP, 2012).

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Men are typically encouraged to use these sites by coworkers, while women are frequently encouraged by friends and family members (McWilliams & Barrett, 2014). Interestingly, one study cited by McWilliams and Barrett (2014) found that men see online dating as a way to quickly jump back into dating following the end of a relationship through death or divorce, whereas women use online sites as a way to ease into the idea of dating again. As with most things, there are both positives and negatives associated with online dating. It is important to be aware of them in order to make an informed decision of whether to use or not use Internet sites to cultivate new relationships. Positives. Access to others – Because of retirement, relocation, and the deaths of family members and friends, one’s social network tends to shrink in later life (Alterovitz & Mendelsohn, 2011). Whereas living close by and having the physical ability to go out and socialize used to be prerequisites to meeting new people, online dating has decreased these geographical, transportation, and physical limitations, thus allowing for older adults to expand their social network to include potential dating partners. Online dating is also beneficial when other ways of meeting new people fail to work. For example, when trying to meet new people through one’s friends or the ways that worked when younger (e.g. church, clubs, bars) is not successful, online dating offers yet another opportunity (Vandeweerd, et al., 2016). This can be especially beneficial for divorced older adults who want to meet people outside of the network they knew with their ex-spouse, or when women need to expand their network because they feel uncomfortable dating the spouses of their late friends (McWilliams & Barrett, 2014). Even when online dating yields little success in creating new relationships, it is seen by some as the only way to connect with new people so they keep using it (Vandeweerd et al., 2016). Control – Older adults, especially women, often find that the sense of control they feel in online dating is a positive reason for taking this approach (Vandeweerd et al., 2016). Traditionally, men have initiated dating interactions, but online sites make it easier for women to make the first contact if they choose to do so. The online world also gives a sense of anonymity that takes away some of the feelings of vulnerability associated with initiating contact in person. One study found that more than 20% of initial contact on online dating sites was initiated by women, although the majority of initial interactions are still led by men. However, it is important to note though that the women using these sites may be more outgoing and proactive about dating than average women. Regardless, despite women’s hesitance to make the initial contact, they are still influential in the pacing and termination of relationships created online (McWilliams & Barrett, 2014). In addition to women feeling they have more control in initiating and maintaining online relationships, an AARP (2012) study found one of the top reasons people over 50 used online dating sites was because there was no pressure. They could respond if they wanted to, but they did not have to. This added to their sense of control over their dating lives. Safety – Due to the fact that the interaction taking place on dating sites happens online makes some feel safe. For example, online daters can view the profiles of potential partners and capture a general understanding of who a person is before ever initiating any form of contact. They can even “Google” the person using other sources to check the background of the person before deciding to initiate contact (Vandeweerd et al., 2016, p. 263). The online platform also allows individuals to limit how much personal information is shared and delay exchanging contact information until they get to know each other better, at which time they will have been able to assess the level of risk and evaluate the potential for the relationship before meeting in person. Many women feel that it would be easier online to part ways if a relationship did not work out and there would be less risk of physical retaliation (Vandeweerd et al., 2016). Friendship – Even though a romantic relationship may not work out, many women have found that friendship is one of the most positive outcomes of online dating. Some older adults decide to remain good friends after they realize that a romantic relationship will not work. This was especially found to be the case when the online daters lived in different states (Vandeweerd et al., 2016). Negatives. Effort – Actively dating, whether in person or online, requires time and effort. However, the competitive nature of online dating requires regularly updating one’s profile and responding to messages, which was seen by some as a negative of online dating (Fileborn, Thorpe, Hawkes, Minichiello, & Pitts, 2015).













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